Continuing our series on NLP Coaching, I would like to introduce you to the Coaching Model for Change.
Most of us have things that we don’t particularly like in terms of our own behaviour. Generally they are behaviours that do not support the general way that we want to live our lives. In NLP terms this is called an incongruity. People often refer to the fact that ‘there is a part of me that ….’ when they are describing this behaviour or these behaviours. We would rather not have the behaviour, but ‘there is a part of me that….’ Our coaching model for change can be used to quit these behaviours and remove the ‘part.’
We all have areas of our life that we wish to improve in some way. Some of us write goals but many of us just harbour thoughts of wanting to improve in that area, wanting to be happier, wanting to be faster, wanting to be slimmer, wanting to be stronger, wanting to have a better work life balance. Our coaching model for change can help you change those thoughts, those wishes, to bring them to reality.
When we think of a part of us that we would like to change, or a certain way in which we would like to improve we experience a general feeling of dissatisfaction, a sense of unease and that may manifest itself in a desire for change.
Think of something now that you would like to change in your life.
Have you got something?
What is stopping you from changing? Think about it. You would like to change and what is stopping you from changing?
For most of us the thing that stops us from changing is fear. We fear losing something. What is that thing that we fear? The mind likes familiarity and so we fear losing that feeling of famil
iarity that the unwanted behaviour gives us.
What happens to most of us is that we experience this fear and it prevents us from making a firm commitment to change. We still have the feeling that we want to change, the desire for change is still there but fear stops us from taking decisive action. This inevitably leads to frustration. We become frustrated with ourselves that we are not moving towards the change that we desire.
What we need to do is to break out of the cycle. Coaching will help you to break out of this cycle.
Your coach listens to you to discover what you want to impr
ove in your life. Your coach gets your vision of who and what you want to be, where you want to go in your life. The job of the coach is not to offer opinion but to give you 100% support towards you achieving your potential.
Your coach can support you in breaking out of that cycle because they do not feel your fear!
So, your coach establishes what it is that you want in life and what you want to improve. They will help you set specific goals in order for you to get to where you want to go. These goals are your commitments to yourself to change. They are your commitments to your unconscious mind to change.
Your goals will include action plans. Specific actions that you need to take in order to achieve your goals. These action plans will enable you to take responsibility for the actions required. Your coach will ensure that your goals have specific timescales and they will monitor with you your progress towards achieving your goals.
You will take action and somewhere along the line, after you have taken your first action steps you will experience transition. Transition from the behaviour that you used to have to the new behaviour.
Your coach will assist you with this transition. One of the things that needs to change in order to make change permanent is that you will need to change your beliefs. Change your beliefs about the person that you used to be, to new empowering beliefs about the person that you want to be in the future. The NLP belief change process that we train on our NLP training courses is perfect for enabling coaches to learn how to work with clients in order to change limiting beliefs.
As we talked about recently the next step in changing behaviour is to acknowledge positive benefits to the new behaviour that you are carrying out. Learn from your experience and recognise the positive benefits of your new behaviour. Ss your coaching continues this is something that your coach can help you bring to your attention.
Finally, our new empowering habit is being forged into our neurology. The more that we carry out an action the deeper our habit becomes. If you stop doing an old habit for long enough you will eventually forget that you had the old habit, and it will be replaced with your new habit.
Your commitment to change, your action in changing and the coaching that you receive in order to support your change will successfully deliver your desired outcome.
This is the process involved in you achieving your potential!
Learn NLP techniques for developing change in yourself and in others online at our NLP Online Training centre. NLP accreditation online.